Wednesday, September 3, 2025

#ISWG: How Do You Tell the Difference Between Opportunity and Distraction?

 

Photo by Paul Skorupskas on Unsplash

Saying Yes

 

Many years ago, I read an article by an agent who advised you to say yes to every opportunity as a writer, especially if you were trying to build your audience.

I suppose that we might all agree it’s not wise to say yes to everything, but I see in the writing community the pressure to constantly say yes to things that can take away from creating:

Critique groups

Book reviews

Conferences

Speaking engagements (not that I get invited to do that yet!)

I do say yes to some things besides just writing. I keep this blog up, my favorite way to be social online. I enjoy writing reviews, and it helps me as a writer because I’m learning to analyze what works and doesn’t work in the books I love. When I can, I attend conferences, although I pour over the session descriptions to make sure I will learn something new. Although sometimes I’ve just attended to see writing friends, and that’s okay too.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash  
 

Saying No 

However, every time I say no, I feel like I’m sitting at the not-so-cool kids’ table. I worry about missed opportunities or that if I turn down something, I might be burning a bridge or not building a community.

But my writing time is so precious. I struggle to make time for my writing, and I struggle to concentrate and show up. It’s also important to me that my family isn’t the last in line for my time or attention. 

There is no local writing group in my town. I usually have to drive an hour to attend most local events. Sometimes I think maybe I should start a group here in my rural town. But I know the time commitment that would take, and I know that means saying no to something else. And that almost always means my own writing.

Photo by Alexis Brown on Unsplash  
 

Talking Instead of Writing 

I’ve been thinking recently about something my first writing teacher and mentor told me: “Be careful of writing groups. Sometimes it's easier to talk about writing than actually do it.”

And that can be true of other writing opportunities as well.

That’s why I’m so careful about letting my yes be a whole-hearted one when I give it.

As I was writing this post, I came across this article about saying no as a writer. What I loved about it was determining your top three goals and using that as a filter for how you filter what you say yes to.

My three goals:


1.  To finish editing this manuscript and start querying.

2.  To research and start my next project.

3.  To continue to grow my writing community through my blog, attending SCBWI events, and writing and encouraging other writers.

Your Turn:

How do you balance your own writing with other demands on your time? What are your three goals? How do you know when to say no?

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