ISWG: Bends in the Road: What My Writing Life Has Taught Me

A winding path at the Oregon Zoo

 

I don’t like to think about regrets. Looking back on the over twenty years I’ve spent as a parent (my oldest turned twenty-four last week) and the time I’ve spent writing, I can think of many things I would’ve done differently with what I know now. But how would I have that knowledge if I hadn’t failed, and in a big way sometimes?

So, yes, I am an imperfect parent. My writing journey has often been a winding path instead of a straight road. Most of what I know is from doing things wrong.

 

 

Insecure Writer's Support Group Question 

If you don’t already know, I am a member of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, a community of authors who share monthly about the creative life. It’s a place to be earnest about our hurdles and celebrate our small victories together.

This month’s question: As a writer/author what is something you regret? Or something that you wish you'd done differently in your writing process?

 

Lessons Learned

1. Sending out my work too soon. 

With my very first novel, I had a more experienced author as a mentor. Even though she warned me that my book was not ready yet, I really thought that because I’d gotten some requests (and one from a major publisher), it had to go out NOW. Of course, I got rejected right away. 

Lesson learned: Always send out your best work.

 
2. Giving my work to critique partners before the story is finished.

This is a lesson I keep learning. Sometimes I’m so excited to share a new idea. Sometimes I just want to see if other people will like it. But I have found that both early praise and early censure kill the bud of my idea. It takes a lot of discipline—but with my latest project—I didn’t even tell people what it was about until I’d written a complete first draft.

Lesson learned: Always take your story as far as you can before you entrust it to others.

 

3. Believing that there is a “right” way to do this writing life. 

From unwritten rules like you need to be in a critique group, never use adjectives/adverbs, to you can’t use big words because kids won’t understand them, I’ve heard them all.  I’ve learned over the years that I have my own process, and that changes with each book. I also like to write protagonists with large vocabularies. Yes, it’s good to learn the “rules” before you venture out on your own, but don’t be afraid to see those rules as tools to find your own voice, not rigid straitjackets.

Lesson learned: Trust your own voice and vision.

 

Notes from the Front Porch 

What creative wisdom would you share with your younger self?

 

I'm so grateful to be part of the Insecure Writer's Support Group community. 

A special thank you to this month's wonderful co-hosts: 

Shannon Lawrence, Diedre Knight, Liza, and Pat Garcia! 

You can join us here.

 

If you love gentle, heart-filled stories, come sit awhile—I’m writing one, too. 

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